Another emotional roller coaster

I know there will be lots of these in the next couple of months, heck probably the next year! but it still doesn’t mean I like them.

What I see when Skyping with Kris

And I’m pretty sure, as I’ve said before, they cycle with my cycle.  😉 Sorry guys.   So Saturday started out ok. I talked with Kris in our usual Sat morning coffee Skype, which was nice.  After that I had planned to get some yard work done but it was raining (which we badly needed!!) so no go there.  I packed some more stuff and that is when I began crying again.  I was packing up my shoes, ya know, the nice ones that I won’t be wearing for a while.  I also dug into my closet and pulled out some boots I haven’t worn in a while and packed those. Then I found the postcard.

It was from Kim Stritmater. A high school friend of mine that passed away in 2007 from cancer.  She was so young and so bubbly that it immediately brought tears to my eyes.

So it was a downward spiral from there. After a bit of crying and almost crying I took the dogs for a walk in the drizzly rain because I *had* to get out of the house.

I also decided that I didn’t need to spend the evening alone, so I went over to my sister’s house where she was having a PartyLite party.  For those of you that don’t know, it’s like Mary Kay, or Longaberger, or Tupperware or Pampered Chef. You have a party and if people buy stuff, you get discounts on your own product. Seems like they could just discount the product and be done with all that farce, but whatever.  It was a nice time and I’m glad I went.  I knew that Steph would understand if I didn’t buy anything and for that I am grateful to her. I did end up buying a candle snuffer. It’s one of those things that you think about buying when you’re blowing out your candles but not when you’re actually out in a store.

So now I will have a candle snuffer. Let’s just hope I remember to use it.

Sunday Kris and I chatted again via Skype and then I did go out and do that yard work stuff I wanted to get done. Basically it was to cut down the blackberries that had grown through my agility fence.  It didn’t take that long and I only received a few scratches on my hands. It was cool enough to wear heavy-ish clothing and my arms and legs are happy about that.  🙂

Then I had a lesson with Alicyn and Jess.  They are both great! Jess is a BC and is so pretty and so smart and just so much fun to play with. Alicyn is a great person and is really trying to keep her dog active and to work with her on even just the basic stuff.  They will go far together.

From there it was down hill again.  I was somewhat tired, my brain didn’t want to think and I hated how I was feeling. So I watched the last of my House DVD and then watched Harry Potter, which I’ve borrowed from my boss at work.  Love those movies!

I did the same thing on Monday.  Couldn’t bring myself to even think about boxes and packing or anything.

Same on Tuesday… do you see a trend?

However today, Wednesday, I am in a much better mood and actually feel like being productive and talking to people.  Which is more of how I prefer to feel.

What got me going on Sat and Sun talking to Kris, was thinking about reserving a truck or pods with which to ship all our crap.  On one of the sites there were some tips about what to leave out and how to pack and not screw up the packing. Such as make sure you have an alarm clock. Use paper plates for the last couple of meals.  Be sure your clothes and/or immediate necessities fit into your car/van/bags.  Clean your bathrooms, defrost your fridge, etc…. That is what got me depressed.

I mean, I’m planning to pack my crap over a weekend and then leave the following weekend. That’s a whole week that I won’t have my dresser or couches or even my bed! What should I sleep on? Do I leave the bed out and then pack it at the last minute the day I’m leaving?  Will all the clothes that I need fit in my bags and then in my car with me, a friend, 2 dogs and all their stuff, plus a 40 gallon tank with Mickey in it?  Ugh! It was too much at the time.

But I’m better now.  I hope.  I’ve also emailed my sister and brother-in-law to ask them if I could potentially crash at their place for those last few days. This would solve a few problems and also let me get the house cleaned up a bit too.  I’m waiting to hear from them and I’m sure I can probably find someplace else to crash for the week as well.

It will all work out.

I hope.

I’m going to begin signing off my posts in the manner of Susan Garrett.

Today I am thankful for the loving devotion of my dogs. Without their forgiveness for my moods and their readiness to snuggle at a moments notice, I’m not sure I would have survived these few months alone.