Sometimes I say things that are not meant the way they are taken. Sometimes I say things without thinking about how they might be perceived. Sometimes I say things without thinking the words through first.
I think I am better at this now then I was say, 15 or 20 years ago, but apparently I still have room for improvement. I made a statement to a friend at a critical time but didn’t think anything of it. The friend took the statement in a negative way. I can’t take the words back and I can’t change how they were perceived but I can apologize and I did. I can also tuck that away and try not to repeat that mistake again.
It is never my intent to hurt anyone or be mean, but sometimes we say things that are received in a negative fashion. Apologize and try to learn from it. Hopefully without ruining any friendships along the way.
On the other hand if someone were to hurt my feelings, I would hope that I can either let it go hoping they didn’t mean to do so, or ask that person about their words or actions. Not letting the offender know they offended, makes it difficult for the offender to make it right if they can. Cold shoulder or lack of contact is just as hurting to the feelings of the offender when they don’t even know they did anything wrong.