Long Time No Write

It’s been a minute since I’ve written. Ok several minutes.

Fine a few years!

Been thinking things through lately and trying to organize my thoughts so decided to give this a go as a possibility. Thinking that maybe if I write it down, it will make more sense. Or I can figure shit out.

Mostly trying to figure out how to be “happy”. I have all these ideas about things I would like “someday” so I spend more time than is probably useful, thinking those things over. Why isn’t what I have good enough? What is it that makes me want to make changes? To keep “improving” on current life?

I wanted a barn. So started looking into building a bigger barn on the current property. Excavation costs and building costs would be so high because we live on a slope. So I gave that up “at this property” and settled for some improvements to the existing barn.

I wanted a shed for the field so equipment that isn’t being used could be stored out of the sun and weather. Well that is “too expensive” so gave that up too.

I would like a master bathroom someday. I had one in my first house and miss it. Got an estimate for adding on 8’ by 20’ of house and at $200k, that’s probably not going to happen.

I spend every day working from home with freezing cold feet. Would love to have an office where I didn’t need to run a heater IN THE SUMMER! 😐

So perhaps when we pay off the HELOC we just move? But I really do like where we live. Despite the hill. And the cold feet. Sigh. Our location is great for being near friends and near town.

Why can’t I be happy?